Installment four of work space photos find us in the sanctum sanctorum of the fine mind behind Barely Knit Together, one of my favorite bloggers. She wants you to know that she manages to pull this off while raising three children and supporting a husband who has recently spent time in Iraq. So, despite all that she still finds time to post some very interesting stuff, including some of her poetry. Thanks BKT for sharing—you rock!!
The Diaper Proving Grounds - Image credit: Barely Knit Together
That is so. Freaking. Depressing. Look, it’s 9am, and BKT is drinking Guiness! That’s a dessert beer, doesn’t she know anything??
I’m happy to explain anything of curiosity that you see here. Unless it could incriminate me.
Yo, do me a solid and put that extra ‘n’ in Guinness, wouldya? Your a doll. Mua.
Is that an OSHA-approved cord draped over the heater?
Look, my kids have to play with something while I work, right? Don’t judge me, man. None of the outlets work anyway, so the cord isn’t live.
Thought the same thing Lion. Also can you pick up your crap off the floor before you take a pic? And you should turn the microwave around so you don’t have to get up to make your popcorn to go with the beer. ha ha
Damn. This is what I get for entertaining you guys?
And I thought Tannerleah had a tough crowd.
I could have taken the photo from a different angle, cleaned up a bit (again, since it was clean until the kids pulled crap out of the drawer), airbrushed out the wrinkles and gotten rid of the spare tire with Photoshop, but NO – I’m giving you the real deal here! This is where the raw grunt work of writing happens.
If you need a prissy little nook for your craft, look elsewhere. Only the big boys play here.
Hmmm. Something about that last sentence doesn’t sound quite right…
Dear Fundamental,
Can you please throw something up there about you making me send you this photo? You did kinda guilt me into it, you know, with all your flattery and what not and the case of Guinness you sent me.
Hugs,
BKT
[...] This post was Twitted by BarelyKnit – Real-url.org [...]
Is that the resolute desk or just a very good replica?
and
What book are you using as a coffee cup coaster?
The desk is a $50 beast that has a pull up and out thing for your typewriter to sit on. Yes, I said typewriter. The drawers stick. Did I mention it was $50?
The coaster is the “How Not to Write a Novel” I mention in my response to the interrogation by Alantru. Reading it is an excellent way to delay any actual writing.
Interrogation????
I don’t recall flashing a white light in your face and saying “Where were you last Monday, doll face?”
Speaking of which… “Where were you last Monday, doll face…?”
It’s a pretty safe bet that I was right beside you, Alantru. Right beside you.
Somewhere on the intertubes, anyway.
Hah! Good point. Hahaha.
Then the question is “Where was I last Monday?”
Seriously, do you know? I could use your help here.
I think it involved a microwave. And a box of tissues. It was quite a taxing evening, if I remember correctly.
I thought it was a bread machine and beer.
Once again, I am sadly confused.
Thank goodness I’m meeting with the ghost of Freud on Monday.
He’ll get me sorted out.
From this desk the brilliance flows! (Oh, and the odd Guinness!)
I like it. It’s warm and sweet, like the author who works there.
Yay! Questions are allowed!
What is to the left of us that we can’t see?
Is it true you once punched out Mr. Fad Gadget? Any why?
Can you tell me about the book on the counter (in rhyming couplet, please)?
What’s in the coffee cup? Why?
What’s that little jar beside the beer? Is there anything in it worth sharing?
What’s that hanging out of the desk drawer (middle right)?
Is it true you once punched out Kurt Cobain?
What would Bob Trusty’s mum make of your work space?
Any truth to the rumors that you and Bob are dating?
What’s your favorite microwaveable food?
Is your chair comfy? (Please use the words “nerk” “flounce” and “LOSTL” in your reply)
I see a case below the chair. Is there where you keep some of your knitting stash?
Since you started with sweet talk, I have to respond or I look like a putz, right?
-To the left is the rest of that radiator. It’s 10 feet long. Seriously. And a window air conditioner unit (it’s a study in paradox). A kid’s paper/dry erase board easel from Ikea, and a dresser full of cook books.
-I did punch out Fad Gadget, because he killed my chicken so he could cover himself with feathers. Everyone knows you’re supposed to wear goose feathers.
-The book on the counter:
You’ve asked me this question previously.
Regarding the book you can’t seem to see.
At least well enough to discern
It’s title, which now you will learn.
It’s not about kitten or birdie or spaniel.
It’s just The Poetry Home Repair Manual.
-The coffee cup contains coffee. Because it’s the elixir of life. On the coffee cup it says (in chalk) “Fundamental Jelly rocks my world!” For real; I even sent him a closeup of it.
- The jar beside the beer is something called Therapy Oil, which I keep in my doula bag. It’s for massaging sore muscles. See the question about the chair, below.
- It’s a Belkin patch cable. The whole desk is filled with computer/electronics stuff.
- Kurt Cobain WISHES he had been punched out by the likes of me. I was too good for him and he KNEW it. Wait a minute…which boyfriend was that again?
- Bob Trusty’s mum would throw holy water on my work space and make Bob lash himself with a hair shirt. Wait a minute…I think I’m mixing my religious metaphors again.
- Bob and I have a purely professional relationship. While we may have some short made-for-the-internet video segments in the works, rumors about us holding hands and eating ice cream together are greatly exaggerated. http://bobtrusty.com/2009/02/27/into-the-great-wide-open/
-My favorite microwavable food is the Fair Tax, as you can see from the magnet stuck to the side. After that, I’d have to say edamame. I have a little bit of an edamame problem, actually.
- No, my chair is not flouncing comfy. In fact, it nerks. That’s why I need my Therapy Oil. Bob rubs it in and it feels so nice. Just kidding! LOSTL!
- That “case” is…a bread machine. The house is 102 years old. The outlets are few and far-between, and there is almost no counter space. Also, my stash is too big for such a small case. I’ve got the biggest stash of them all.
I believe someone asked about the other books, so: under the coffee cup is “How Not to Write a Novel.” An excellent read, funny, helpful, and a great way to avoid actually writing anything. On top of the tower are David Sedaris’s “Holidays on Ice” and Richard Brautigan’s “Trout Fishing in America,” “The Pill vs. The Springhill Mine Disaster” and “The Abortion.” It’s three books in one!
Here is a sampling of Brautigan’s amazing work:
I Live In The Twentieth Century
I live in the Twentieth Century
and you lie here beside me. You
were unhappy when you fell asleep.
There was nothing I could do about
it. I felt hopeless. Your face
is so beautiful that I cannot stop
to describe it, and there’s nothing
I can do to make you happy while
you sleep.
Thank you. I am happy. Soon I shall dance.
You are worthy to be linked with Britney — and then some!
LOSTL! MADE FOR THE INTERNET! LOSTL!
Mum would have told me off if my room was messy. She told me off for having a plate in my room once. Its all very strict.
She says “A Clean room means a Clean Mind, Robbie”, but that workspace looks wonderful! A delightful area to complete ones studies of the written language! I LOVE IT!
Bob
The candles and tissues handy for a romantic cyber evening? Just askin…
Romantic evening? Hmmmm.
Oh, yeah! I remember those! The last time I had one of those was two kids ago. Except I guess there must have been two of them in there, somewhere, right?
And suddenly, while driving down the road, she thought to herself:
What do tissues have to do with a romantic evening? Unless you’re a guy, I mean.
And suddenly, while driving down the road, she thought to herself:
What do tissues have to do with a romantic evening? If you’re not a guy, I mean.
And suddenly, while sitting at above referenced workspace, she thought to herself:
You fucking idiot! You can’t stop the sending of a comment, edit it and then re-send it.
Great, interesting photo with lots of mystery. Is that a “Fair Tax” logo on the side of the micro wave? If so, You have my vote! But beer and coffee at the same time, kind of like a speedball!
I have to satisfy all my personalities, timm, or they’d start an uprising and mayhem would ensue.
Yay, Fair Tax! I’m a contributor. Thank you for your vote, but I don’t think my habits would stand the scrutiny required for running for public office.
Oops, actually meant to clarify the the beer bottle was left from the previous night, and the coffee was fresh. Or at least, freshly microwaved.
Beer…Candles…Tissues…what appears to be a blue slinky…a small bottle of who know what…Must have been one crazy night
[...] my work space was featured on my friend Fundamental Jelly’s blog, complete with fun explanations, amusing insults, and general frivolity. Go on over and join the [...]
oh dear, what can I say to add excitement and/or amusement to this thread. Nothing. I’m a loser. I just like following BKT around. No really, I’m not a creep. I just recently ran into BKT’s blog, but now I’m beginning to wonder if I could ever keep up with you guys and your wit!! Maybe I need to go mess up this office a bit more
You are a person of discerning taste, is what you are, yorksnbeans! Since this little club seems to have a corner on all the funny blogs around these parts, I often feel like a Fundamental Jelly, Ram and Alantru stalker.
Actually, I guess I kind of am. Somehow, I don’t think they mind.
Well, now you’ve got a buddy!
If you’re following me, how come I’m the one always saying, “I’m standing right beside you.”
By the way.
I’m standing right beside you. Right beside you.
Sorry I can’t join in the fun, but I am out in the field the rest of the week. You seem to be doing fine without me. Cheers, I will try to check-in when possible.
We miss you. And I must say, I like the name Pentecostal Fundamental Jelly. The name, mind you. Not the idea.
FundamentalJelly is out getting bit by serpents, again! Like a pentecostal FJ! Have fun out there.
Right about now, an old man is looking him up and down. He’s pulling on his suspenders and is seconds away from muttering the words… “You’re not from around here, are you?”
And then…
Oh no, here we go again! I’ll be back later after coffee.
Gulp !!!
Reminds me of my home work area, except it you would see my notebook plopped wherever I would be able to find some space.
Beer in the morning.
Breakfast of the working poor.
Breakfast of champions, dammit! My current notebook is the brown, flat-ish thing on top of the books on the tower. I get them in packs of three and they are very basic, but I can manage carrying several of them so I can keep ideas separate when need be. For some reason, they are also less intimidating than my other Moleskines. Maybe it’s the leather cover or the permanence of it, but I feel stifled.
These are much better.
I see the tissue box is within reach. Alot of emo stuff going on at your workspace?
What’s emo? Oh wait! You mean emotions? No, we’re fresh out. The tissues are to hide the bottle of whiskey I keep by the microwave.
Dude,
Where’s my groin maul?
Dude, you owe me a series of apologies. That shit you said about my mother, that stuff about me and groin mauling, your misleading advertising tagging and now this. Where’s the groin mauling?????? This blows chunks and sucks doggy dicks at the same time. I search my ass off for groin mauling and end up on some stupid asshead site with no sign of groin mauling anywhere. Apologize! Oh man, this sucks like a… a…. a…. fucking vacuum cleaner! Yeah! Ha! Ha! Fuck this. I am so out of here.
Pentecostal works in front of anything! Pentecostal road rage, Pentecostal Jack hammer, Pentecostal syndrome, Pentecostal hand basket, Pentecostal Beer… ok some don’t work!
I wholeheartedly agree, Timm, though I’d never considered it before.
And I just checked out your gorgeous website and I suddenly crave a chilled glass of Riesling. Pentecostal or not.
When I’m famous, will you take the photos for my blog?
BKT, You betcha! All Fair Tax Contributors get a discount too! Thanks for checking out my site. I have been sneaking over to your blog and not commenting yet but if I commented on how cool it is here and now it would sound like I was just trading compliments. (that’s a long sentence!)
I will gush about your blog at another time so it seems genuine!
“The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’ve got it made.”
–Jean Giraudoux
So i have a question…why not submit the picture that is actually on the computer screen? And is that actually your screen saver? Just cant get enough of your desk, being vintage and all?
Alright, theboss! You win a prize! Which is my disdain for your inappropriate use of sarcasm. I mean, you invited me here and now your all, “just can’t get enough of your desk??”
You did invite me here, right?
Oh.
Anyway, I’m impressed with your powers of observation, since you’re the first person to notice the photo on my monitor. I was going for an effect similar to looking into a mirror with a mirror behind you, or filming the image of yourself on TV filming yourself on TV. Wait, is that possible?
Actually, I did hate my desk, but you’ve made me look at it in a new light by calling it “vintage.” I think I’ll put it up on Craigslist as a vintage desk and ask $500 for it.